My Dates Always Involve Flatulence
I have several flatulence stories to share so let’s start with two drinks, six wings and a Sports Bar. Wings shouldn’t give you gas, but you never know what ingredients are in the ranch and blue cheese dressing when they make it from scratch. You see where I’m going with this? Who can turn down homemade ranch dressing, not me!!! Not 3 minutes later I felt a hot rush of smooth air escape my bum before I could catch it. All of a sudden the smell became a fog and I became speechless.
There was no one conveniently walking by to blame, and the smell never went away the entire date. Gas comes from two main sources: swallowed air and normal breakdown of certain foods by harmless bacteria naturally present in the large intestine. Fats and proteins cause little gas. Gas is made primarily of odorless vapors — carbon dioxide, oxygen, nitrogen, hydrogen, and sometimes methane. The unpleasant odor of gas comes from bacteria in the large intestine that releases small amounts of gases that contain sulfur. According to the Cleveland Clinic, the average person produces 1 to 3 pints of gas every 24 hours and passes it about 14 times a day. Most people consider the amount of gas they pass daily to be excessive, even though statistically it falls in the normal range. Did you fart during your Valentines date? Tell me your story.
