Doechii Opens Up About Overcoming Dark Times and Embracing Her Power

In a powerful new cover story with The Cut, rapper Doechii opened up about how she overcame a dark period in her life when she was in sixth grade. "I don’t want to get super-dark," Doechii told the outlet. "I was getting bullied so bad that I was thinking about killing myself."

At her lowest point, she had a realization that shifted everything. "I realized, 'Oh, f---, I’m gonna kill myself and then I’m gonna be the only one dead.' The bullies aren’t gonna be with me, and everything they said is not coming with me either," she explained. "I would just be gone."

That thought sparked something inside her. "And then I was like, 'F--- that!'" she recalled. "'F--- that s---! I’m not going for that!' And this wash of peace came over me, and I received ‘I am Doechii.’"

To her, it felt like a message straight from God, so she wrote it down. "But it was more like this feeling of — 'I made a choice, a decision. I am the most important character in this movie. This is my motherf---ing movie,'" she said.

Beyond her personal journey, Doechii also spoke about the power of honesty in music, pointing to Lauryn Hill as a major influence. "The feeling that I have when I listen to The Miseducation of Lauryn Hill is the same feeling I want some other Black little girl to have when she listens to me," she shared. "And in order for her to have that feeling, I have to talk about my feelings."

If you or someone you know is struggling with thoughts of suicide, help is available. Call the 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline by dialing 988, or visit 988lifeline.org.